In my last post, I dove into the body + emotional overlap and shared how: 

• Our physical sensations and emotions are deeply intertwined

• The body provides signals and guideposts for our emotional state

• Paying attention to physical sensations can help us understand and process our emotions

• Chronic tension or pain may be linked to underlying emotional patterns

• Aligning our actions with our true desires can lead to greater physical and emotional well-being

Our bodies and emotions are intricately connected, forming a powerful feedback loop that informs our experiences and choices. Today, we’re going to zoom in on another inner relationship: the interplay between our minds and our emotions.

Just as our physical sensations can clue us into our emotional landscape, our thoughts and beliefs profoundly impact how we feel. This mental-emotional connection is a key piece of the holistic human experience puzzle we’ve been exploring.

I’ll focus on the mental aspects of our emotions and explore how our thoughts shape our emotional reality and, conversely, how our emotions influence our thinking patterns. 

Mental – The Mind, Analysis, Thinking – Self Perception –
What We Believe

By developing emotional intelligence, we can better interpret the signals our emotions send us, make more informed decisions, and communicate more effectively with others. This skill has been invaluable in helping me recognize when I’m slipping into people-pleasing patterns or when my fear of disappointing others is driving my behavior.

By thinking about our emotions and giving them names, we can become more aware of them and their effect on us. This can help us become more emotionally present. But it can also lead us into tricky territory. Sometimes, we overthink our feelings. We create stories in our minds that can make the emotion stronger or change its meaning entirely.

The trick is to find a balance. We want to acknowledge and understand our emotions without getting too caught up in thinking about them. Mindfulness can help here. It teaches us to observe our thoughts and feelings without judging them or getting too attached.

By understanding how our thoughts and emotions work together, we can better understand ourselves. This awareness can help us respond to our experiences more wisely and kindly.

Thinking Energy: Reflections from a Recovering People Pleaser

How do we perceive ourselves? The answer plays a huge role in how we show up in the world.

If we view ourselves as a victim, we are going to act in the world as a victim. If our mindset says we’re incapable of doing something, such as taking a break, then we will be exactly that. How we view ourselves and think about ourselves has a ripple effect into both what we do as well as what’s happening on a subconscious and energetic level.

As a recovering people pleaser, I’ve noticed internal narratives coming up worrying how people view me. Am I doing enough? Am I saying the right things? Even though I’ve done years of therapy, mindset work, self-development, and so on, I still struggle with anxiety and feelings of unworthiness from time to time. This is a facet of my human life. Our minds are hardwired with various patterns, beliefs,and memories that we can shift, but it takes a lot of time and patience. And no matter what, there is always an echo of past traumas and negative experiences that influence us. Compassion is key here. 

Even so, with clearly stated boundaries, I find an insecure part of me wondering:

• Will people be annoyed by my autoresponder?

• Will they be offended that the email says how they can work with me?

• Are people going to not want to network, collaborate, or hire me because I have the audacity to put my boundary out there like this?

Other than that, I wasn’t super concerned with emails aside from those anxious questions above. There were very few that I responded to, saying, “Great, I’ll get back to you in July,” to let them know I was excited.

But what if I’d let myself be completely unplugged? The truth is, I still had a belief it wasn’t safe to completely let go during this time. I feared “dropping the ball” on something or someone important. I felt insecure and afraid.

In observing why I responded during my time off, I see there was some compulsion from old people pleasing patterns, for sure. But, for the most part, I was able to notice it and resist it gently.

Another big compulsion and negative thought pattern I’ve come to terms with thanks to this sabbatical, “If other people are working, I need to work, too.” I believed that I needed to be productive if anyone else was, which is completely ridiculous. There’s always going to be someone being productive when I’m not. If I saw one of my partners working, I would feel this compulsive need to do some work, likely a codependent holdover of feeling like I need to be on all the time for others, show up as the rock star, and generally force myself to be a machine.

So many of my patterns of over-showing up were based on limiting beliefs still rooted in my subconscious!

Shame, Fear, & Disappointment

This Monday work pattern wasn’t the only compulsion I noticed during my sabbatical. As I observed my thoughts and behaviors more closely, I became aware of other deeply rooted emotional responses that were influencing my actions and challenging my commitment to rest.

Shame, Fear, and Disappointment are three emotional states or feelings that are intertwined with our self-perception and sense of self. These three emotions represent the three sort of “Achilles’ Heel” feelings that can really cripple us and bring us into a low state.

I noticed shame around not “showing up” when others were working. This shame was deeply rooted in my people-pleasing tendencies and the belief that my worth is tied to my productivity.

I felt fear about finances, the future, and what others thought of me. The uncertainty of taking time off triggered anxieties about financial stability and my professional reputation.

I toed the line of disappointment, saying no to certain events or engagements to preserve my energy. Part of me still wanted to do it all, and saying no meant confronting the reality that I can’t always please everyone.

These emotional experiences during my sabbatical highlighted the complex interplay between my thoughts, feelings, and actions. They challenged me to sit with discomfort and reassess my priorities.

Looking Back

This sabbatical experience has been—dare I say it—transformative.

Shedding light on the intricate connections between my thoughts, emotions, and actions is important so I can untangle them and create a life more suited to my dreams. It’s highlighted the ongoing work I need to do in challenging my people-pleasing tendencies and redefining my relationship with productivity and rest.

Being intentional about rest, relaxation, and deliberately working less yielded an eye-opening time of self-discovery, challenging my deeply ingrained beliefs about work, rest, and self-worth. While I’ve always supported my clients to the utmost when it comes to embracing their dreams, energy, and flow, I realize where it’s been hard for me and where I haven’t consistently given myself the same treatment.

All that is changing! As I continue to process these insights, I’m committed to cultivating a healthier relationship between my mind and my emotions.

Moving forward, I’m focusing on:

1. Honoring my boundaries without guilt

2. Recognizing and challenging limiting beliefs

3. Embracing a slower, more intentional pace

4. Aligning my actions with my true desires and energy levels

This month, I’ve been deep-diving insights from my sabbatical experience.

I’ve explored: 

• Productivity Culture Nearly Broke Me, So I Took a Sabbatical

• Why I Took a Month Long Sabbatical

• My Sabbatical Month Shared in Photos

• The Art of Rest: Embracing Simple Pleasures During My June Sabbatical

• Embracing Holistic Alignment: Physical and Emotional Insights from My Entrepreneur’s Sabbatical

I love offering free resources! Check out my guided meditations on Insight Timer, or check out our mental health and wellness related freebies on LivingLUNAs resource page. 

This month, I’m participating in the Ultimate Blog Challenge and share wisdom gleaned from my sabbatical, butterfly medicine, and more. Feel free to follow along if you want to learn more about my story! #UltimateBlogChallenge https://www.ultimateblogchallenge.com/

Want to chat with me directly? Join the LivingLUNAs Discord: https://discord.gg/5UkGZb9kYp